Saturday, November 26, 2016

Thinking Life Over

In the past year I made big decisions. Sometimes I ponder back to whether I made these choices well.

I flip flop on this topic. just this week I felt greatly relieved that I lived through 2 intense presentations to senior management. Here I have an opportunity to be close to central strategy and the heartbeat of the company. A year ago, I was miserably bored at my old job wanting a desperate change. And here the opportunity was given to me but with a huge trade off.

The trade off is after tax real wage is plain awful in Germany. While everyone would typically look forward to their paycheck every month, I dread it. Each time I log into my HR system, I cringe and I go into this depression mode, thinking about how little I am paid in relative to the long hours I work.

I trod off to the supermarket and 30 mins later I'm back home with a bottle of wine and chocolate. There's better ways to overcome this awful feeling, me thinks. Google random bright lipsticks from gorgeous bloggers; Google nature and hiking holidays in Europe; Play a bit of chill house music... an hour later I feel a lot better and a bit tipsy.

Alright, so here it is... it's sunk cost. What I have decided to do with my life for the next 2 years won't change. I might as well enjoy life now that I'm here. I'm unfit from gorging myself on crap food due to stress from work, relocation and MBA school. I'm going to have to make Munich work one way or another - even with the crap pay that I'm on and the insane pressures of work. 

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